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Unclear demonstrative pronoun reference

The amount of information that needs to be entered into the database is enormous, and it needs to be entered in a different way for each patient. This will make the design process complex." The example uses a demonstrative pronoun (such as this, these, or those), but there are two or more possible…

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Example

The amount of information that needs to be entered into the database is enormous, and it needs to be entered in a different way for each patient. This will make the design process complex."

What's wrong?

The example uses a demonstrative pronoun (such as this, these, or those), but there are two or more possible antecedents. To which does the pronoun refer? Consider this example: The new equipment arrived yesterday, and everything is in working order. This was something of a surprise. Which is surprising? The fact that the equipment arrived, or that it was in working order, or both?

How to fix this problem

Supply a clarifying noun: The new equipment arrived yesterday, and everything is in working order. This happy outcome was something of a surprise.

Rhetoric & Composition

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